With all the winding-up that had taken place before this game, you’d have been forgiven for thinking that this match had real importance. In reality though, this was just a chance for Whisky to show off his sublime (?!) skills in front of his charges, and for everyone else to laugh at Ballo trying to score.

A goal. Shut it.

Terry Murray had done a, well, a ‘Terry’ and not turned up. Apparently, tonight was his wedding anniversary, a fact he seemed to have been unable to remember last week when he said he’d be available. In fairness, a lot of guys forget that sort of stuff, though, and we’ll forgive him this once. Mrs Terry would have murdered him anyway, if he’d come out to play.

So, the Perceys had 8, and it was suggested that we play 8-a-side because…well, it seemed like a good idea. Torquay Ladies actually looked quite confident, and the pre-match huddle was more than the Percey’s usual routine…”Oh, bloody hell, do I have to go left-back *again*?” A quick note to say the opposition was another team who chose to play in yellow – The great bunch of girls.

The game itself…well, I don’t remember a great deal, because I very rarely do, but. Liam scored the first two goals. Badders got the third, and Alex Head (yes, him!) scored the fourth before half-time. At half-time the Perceys suggested that the Ladies bring on the rest of their subs and play against the 8. Can’t remember how many there were, exactly..they kept moving around, making it difficult for me to count.

The second half started with a goal for the Percey’s, Marek Cole the scorer. Not long after that, though, a mistake on the edge of D gifted the ball to (I think) Rachel Gue who was able to get a good shot away that Ronaldo Kingdon decided he didn’t feel like catching, and it went in. This is where things get decidedly hazy, Andy came out of goal to play outfield for the first time in a Perceys shirt, and scored one. Maz got the final goal (just after someone clever, I think Whisky, said “next goal wins”.) Oh and Liam got one more to complete his hat-trick. How many’s that? 8? It’s possible that somebody else scored but I really don’t remember who. At some stage in the half, Whisky had thought it a good move to ask one of the girls behind the goal to stand in as keeper for a bit, and she then rolled the ball out to Vicky (quick check on the TLFC website) Elliott to score.

That’s about it. It was good fun, although next time I see the Torquay goalie I shall have a few words cos she made a few fabulous saves, 3 from me, (which is just typical) and somehow managed to get down to some shot which she had no right to…At the end of the game I was waiting for the surely traditional exchange of shirts, but nobody else seemed that interested, although Clare had got to that stage about half-way through the second half.

And now I’m going to go and watch Spider-man 2 again. And I’ve hurt my shoulder. Nobody cares, though :-(

Team:Kingdon; Ballard; Head; Badcott; Cole; Cocks; Scales; Down